As I was saying Middlemarch has many truths that still stands today. Nothing more truthful than what I found on page 51 describing so poignantly what I, and I am sure many of you, go through every day.
“We mortals, men and women, devour many a disappointment between breakfast and dinner-time; keep back tears and look a little pale about the lips, and in answer to inquiries say, ‘Oh, nothing!’ Pride help us; and pride is not a bad thing when it only urges us to hide our own hurts – not to hurt others.”
I ran into an acquaintance of mine the other day. She graduated high school with me. The following is a bit of our conversation that illustrates the exact quote written above. Lets call her lady; or maybe girl, I don’t think she would like being called a lady for fear of seeming old.
Girl: Oh wow! Is that you? I haven’t seen you since graduation! Wow you look so different!
Me: (Pride help me) Yes yes time flies by. You look exactly the same.
Girl: I know hehe. So what are you up to?
Me: I have three kids, two girls and a boy.
Girl: Ohh .. that’s so nice. And..?
Me: And what?
Girl: So what do you do? Do you work?
Me: No I don’t I’m a stay at home mom.
Girl: Oh but what do you do with your day?
Me: (Please just tell me the right answer so I can end this conversation. Why do I find that I have this need to explain myself to this woman.) You know, taking care of the house and kids. What are you up to?
Girl: Oh you know nothing really. I just finished running the marathon. (Ooh so that’s the right answer…) and now I am training for the next season. I am also starting my own business and running around now to get the final paperwork in place.
Me: Good for you! That sounds great! Good luck with everything!
Girl: Yes yes it was so good running into you. If you want to do anything with all time on your hands just let me know. We could use someone like you, you know. It’s such a shame you were always the top of our class.
Me: (Fighting back tears and looking a little pale around the lips) Yes yes I’ll call you soon. Nice to see you too. Bye.
I went back home feeling frustrated, flushed, a bit angry and a bit ashamed.
Then I opened the door, was greeted with my husband’s smile, two kids that came running, and a baby who extended her arms so I can carry her.
Those feelings quickly changed to that of love, gratitude, and an overwhelming feeling of being blessed.
So very very blessed.